You are a great guy. This woman likes you and you know it. You’ve met her a few
times. You know she likes you by the way she smiles when she says your name. Right
now, she’s walking towards you. She smiles and says something. You freeze and choke
on the words in your mouth. You can’t say a word and you are worried that if you
open

your mouth, she will think you are an idiot. What should you do? How do you ease
into a nice conversation with a woman without freezing up? There are two important
things to remember when you talk to a woman. One of them says you care and the other
says you are confident.
The first thing is to listen and

pay attention. Listen carefully to what she is saying and at the same time pay attention
to what she is not saying or what she’s implying. The second thing is to not worry
about what she will think of you or what will happen if you say something.
It seems easy and simple, isn’t it? It is simple but not as easy as it seems. When
you see any smart

and suave man talking to a woman, they make it look really simple. It’s because
they’ve practiced it a thousand times. So, let’s practice.

Conversations start with your eyes and your ears.

Keep your eyes and ears open, always. When you are

watching a movie which is really gripping, would you dare blink your eyes or let
your attention wander? No, you wouldn’t because if you miss a scene or a piece of
dialogue, you know you could miss the whole plot. Talking to a woman is the same
as watching a movie. It can be eminently enjoyable and rewarding, if you pay

attention. It should be quite easy to do especially if she is beautiful and you
are smitten. In fact, the opposite is true. It is because she is distractingly beautiful
and your mind is full of thoughts about her that it is difficult for you to talk
to her.
Do you have trouble talking to men? Do you have trouble talking to other women?
Let’s

say your sister, or the woman behind the counter at the café or a colleague at work.
No, you don’t, do you? (If your answer is yes, then you are probably in love with
all of them, which isn’t rational and that’s a different problem altogether.) Freezing
up and not being able to talk to a woman is due to attraction. When you are attracted

to a woman, you tend to lose control of your mental and cognitive faculties.
Attraction works on your mind and senses like fear or anger. Emotional impulse rules
over rational response. Too much pressure on an amateur sportsperson can cause him
or her to perform poorly while a professional player or champion

performs extremely well even under pressure. Why? It’s practice which makes the
difference. So you need to control or get used to being attracted to women. How
do you do this? There are some very simple techniques you can apply to acquire the
skill of easing into a pleasant conversation with any woman, anytime. Recall in
your mind a recent conversation

that you had with a female colleague or your sister. You will realize that most
of the things that you said consisted of what is called small talk. Small talk Involves
making comments that are safe and seemingly innocuous.
If you can’t think of any recent conversations of your own, then think of scenes
from a movie

or dialogues from a book. In fact, go out and rent a few classic romantic movies
or pick up some romantic novels. Pay special attention to the conversations that
take place in the books and movies. Replay or reread them if necessary till they
are committed to your memory. Now, think about these conversations.

The phrase ‘sweet nothings’ might come to mind. You will realize that what you say
is not really as important as how you say it because when you say it with sincerity,
the girl knows you care. Now, let us look at the second aspect of holding a conversation
which is confidence.

A conversation does not precede action.

The conversation is the action. You will not find the best dialogues in the prelude
to a story. You will find it most probably right in the middle of the story. So
when you are having a conversation, be present in the moment. Enjoy it and you

will soon learn that you are no longer diffident or that your mind is not a blank.
One of the reasons why your mind stops functioning is because you are thinking of
too many things. You are thinking what she will think or how she will react if you
say something. You are thinking where this conversation will lead you to. Obviously,
you are thinking

of what you will do together after you finish talking. What you don’t realize is
that when you think like this you’ve already lost control over the conversation.
A woman can sense it when you say something without really meaning it. Honesty and
sincerity are the keys to keeping a woman engaged in a conversation.

When you enjoy talking to the woman, you are not thinking of what will happen next
and this creates a magical connection. When you are committed to the conversation,
you exude confidence. It’s an irresistible combination. The woman you are talking
to has given you the most valuable thing she has. No, it’s not her heart, it’s her
attention.